don't do this

2007-06-02T23:42:00.000+08:00

this is for you austin :)

2007-05-20T20:34:00.000+08:00

I wrote your name in the sand but,
I know it won't stay
I wrote your name in the sand
and watched it wash away.

It's gone forever...It won't ever be back
We'll never be together,
For the love that we lack.

I wrote your name in the sand
Does it really matter today?
I wrote your name in the sand
Like you, it washed away.

the acoustic song/your guardian angel

2007-05-04T21:12:00.000+08:00

when i see your smile
tears run down my face
i can't replace
and now that i'm strong
i have figured out
how this world turns cold
and it breaks through my soul
And i know i'll find deep inside me
i can be the one

i will never let you fall
i'll stand up with you forever
i'll be there for you through it all
even if saving you sends me to heaven

seasons are changing
and waves are crashing
and stars are falling all for us
days grow longer and nights grow shorter
i can show you i'll be the one

i will never let you fall
i'll stand up with you forever
i'll be there for you through it all
even if saving you sends me to heaven

cause you're my,
you're my, my, my true love
my whole heart
please don't throw that away

cause i'm here for you
please don't walk away and
please tell me you'll stay, stay

use me as you will
pull my strings just for a thrill
and i know i'll be okay
though my skies are turning gray

i will never let you fall
i'll stand up with you forever
i'll be there for you through it all
even if saving you sends me to heaven

exam stress is driving me crazy
i really wish i was still with you
please come back girl
i need you back in my life

only one

2007-05-01T19:05:00.000+08:00

broken this fragile thing now
and i can't, i can't pick up the pieces
and i've thrown my words all around
but i can't, i can't give you a reason

i feel so broken up
and i give up
i just want to tell you so you know

here i go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
you are my only one
i let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
you are my only, my only one

made my mistakes, let you down
and i can't, i can't hold on for too long
ran my whole life in the ground
and i can't, i can't get up when you're gone

and something's breaking up
i feel like giving up
i won't walk out until you know

here i go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
you are my only one
i let go, there's just no one who gets me like you do
you are my only, my only one

here i go so dishonestly
leave a note for you my only one
and i know you can see right through me
so let me go and you will find someone

here i go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
you are my only one
i let go, there's just no one, no one like you
you are my only, my only one
my only one
my only one
my only one
you are my only, my only one

do you know that
everything i say
i mean it
do you know that
every poem i write
it comes from my heart
do you know that
every song i post
it reflects my soul
do you know that
i miss you really badly

i still love you girl
please give me another chance

international you day

2007-04-30T20:15:00.000+08:00

i'm sorry that it took so long to write this song.
but i gave up.
you see one million words can't describe how it feels.
to know your love.

where did i go wrong?
i should have told you from the start.
that i'm closer than you think when we're apart.
nothing that i've tried is as simple as this time

without you.
my life is incomplete.
my days are absolutely gray.
and so i'll try.
let your heart know for sure.
that i have so much more to tell you every single day.

i swear i'm giving up my inside to the one.
that i adore.
i know this world is big enough for you and i.
but i'll give you more.
i'm coming home today.
to wipe the teardrops from your eyes.
i'm totally enamored by your life.
nothing that i've done has ever been for one.

without you.
my life is incomplete.
my days are absolutely gray.
and so I'll try.
let your heart know for sure.
that i have so much more to tell you every single day.

my life is incomplete.
my rights are absolutely wrong.
so wake me up.
before you leave today.
something i need to.
there'll be nothing when you're gone.

there's nothing to look forward to in life now that you're gone.
i really miss you.

2007-04-28T13:58:00.000+08:00

hey -.
you know that there were so many better guys out there for you.
why choose me.?
all i did was treat you nice cause we were close.
ask anyone.
im nice to everyone(:
i didnt try to hint anyth to you.
you knew all about my problems.
in fact you still do.
and you know i still cant get over --.
so why tell me.?
and its my midyears.
you know its my critical period.
you know i have to do well.
why affect me now.?
im not saying anyth.
but really.
those guys you gave up.
they were so much better.
and you're good looking.
look at how many people are after you.
i'm not worth giving up all that.
you yourself told me love cant be forced.
and you know that i still love --.
so why.?
call me when you see this.
and dont cry anymore alright.?
im not worth all those tears of yours.
im just a fish in the ocean.
there're a million other guys.
why me.?
can things remain the way they were before this.?
i treasure our friendship.
and you know that.
i dont wanna throw this friendship away.

cheer up,love.
im just a phonecall away.
give up.
im not worth your tears girl.
all that you've said.
i know you've given up a lot.
but think about it.
i cant force myself to love you.
and i dont wanna break your heart when i realise things arent going well.
as my other close friend told me.
i must learn to say no.
i'd rather say no and let you sadden yourself now.
rather than sometime later.
you realise things arent that ideal when we're together.
so be strong.
dont forget.
if there's anyth.
im here.
take care love(:
<3

dont be <\3
be (:

2007-04-27T22:37:00.000+08:00

talking to you just now even for tt short period of time seemed so damn awkward.and why avoid me yesterday.?dont think i didnt notice you.i wont eat you up will i.?and i thought of you during my exam.stoning.and thinking.and you know what.i realised that i love you way too much to give you up.

you take centrestage in my life girl.

2007-04-21T15:26:00.000+08:00

come to think of it.

giving you up wasn't such a good thing after all.
i'm still thinking of you.
still jealous about your proclamations of love for him.
fuck.i still love you.

but what to do.
you'll never love me again.

i'm in a fix.
someone help me.

2007-04-21T12:57:00.000+08:00

goodbye my lover.
goodbye my friend.

this shit is deaddd.

2007-04-06T16:39:00.000+08:00

my love for you is way beyond imagination,
its way past anyone's expectations.
if for you that's not good enough,
what do i have to do to show you my love.
do i have to move a mountain,
or proclaim "i love -" at the musical fountain.
for you i'd gladly take a bullet,
even though its going into not yours but my gut.
i may not live it out,
but i won't have to see you pout.
i'd willingly die for you,
and in the final moments just admire the sky's blue.
the last thing i'd see would be your pretty face,
and die knowing life was not a waste.
because even knowing you was the greatest thing that happened to me,
from the day i knew you i didn't feel empty.
well i never wanna see you tear,
nor your cries i never wanna hear.
well dying for you's the most i can do to show my love for you,
i just hope you know it too.

fly me to the moon .
and let me play among the stars .
in other words please be true .
in other words i love you.

2007-04-05T20:46:00.000+08:00

i've said all that there is to be said,
history still has not been made.
its up to you to make it right,
well can tonight be that special night.
when we get back together,
and make it forever.
the decision is totally yours,
but if you say no i'll go on all my knees or even all fours.
to beg you for a second time,
or to you am i not even worth a dime.
please let me know your answer please let me know it fast,
before i say goodbye and breathe my last.

i think about you constantly.
its all i do,seriously.
i can't get you out of my mind.
cause you're so darn fine.

2007-04-01T20:16:00.000+08:00

i've gotten into the habit of writing love poems nowadays.well i hope you do read and know how much i still love you.here's another one.just for you.

you swept me aside,
and now i have no more bride.
i'd gladly go on my knees,
say please.
can we have another chance together,
and hope it will last forever.
i'll never do anything wrong,
i'd make sure it'll last long.
just give me this one chance,
i'd make sure it'll only be once.
i'll ensure you won't regret it,
just as long as we love each other more than just a bit.
please don't dash my hopes,
the last time you did that all i did was mope.
i totally broke down,
my face was almost eternally a frown.
don't tell me you don't love me,
i'll go crazy.
i think of you every second of the day,
everyone's like 'ray.
cheer up emo shit,
she's so totally not worth it.'
for you everything i do makes it totally worthwhile,
everything you do never comes close to vile.
if this sounds so insincere let me know,
so at least i can lie low.
and make sure no one notices that anything ever happened to me,
if they say 'don't bullshit' i'll just exclaim 'really.'
for now you may not acknowledge my existence,
but just know that my unwavering patience.
will be willing to wait,
with not a single trace of hate.
the only time i ever spoke to you the past few weeks lasted only a few lines,
although i wish we could talk a lot more times.
all this i do i hope you see,
if not all will be fruitlessly.
in vain,
and i'll just seem so lame.

i love you.
i miss you.
i need you.
i want you.

2007-03-30T19:46:00.000+08:00

you complete me,
without you there isnt a we.
i feel as though i have no more life,
i just wanna pick up a knife.
and end my life this very instant,
im not some walking advertistment.
for someone who failed to keep his girl,
and ended up losing the world.
i lost every ounce of freedom i had,
the minute we broke up i went mad.
i said fuck everything,
i had enough of breaking.
well no one gives a shit about me,
whenever you're down there's always he.
you really made me love you with all my heart,
but then you tore it apart.
so now im trying to remedy it,
just fix it back bit by bit.
you're totally irreplaceable,
cause when i'm with you life's a whirl.
time passed so damn fast while we were together,
but sadly i realise there will never ever.
be another chance that you'll give me,
and i know this is just reality.
i really wish you're back with me,
if not i know i'll never be.
in love with another one,
then i guess i'll be done.
it was real nice knowing you,
but i guess we just werent true.
i just want to make it right,
and i so want you by my side tonight.

specially for you.

2007-03-26T17:32:00.000+08:00

everyday reality sets in,
i wonder how you have been.
i wake up with tears in my eyes,
wondering why the time flies.
by the time i realise no longer are you mine,
that's when i don't feel fine.
i feel a sense of loss,
and no matter what the cost.
i will get you back,
cause you are all that i lack.
not only do i miss you,
life is getting hard to go through.
and in everything i do,
i love you.

on sunday.i woke up.and just thought of this poem.just for you.there were other parts as well.but i cant put em here for fear of pissing off some ppl.just know what i write.is from the bottom of my heart.

whatthefuck.

2007-03-24T20:13:00.001+08:00

what the hell.?!who the fuck gives ten chinese compres as homework.?and within three days.?what the fuck is your problem.?you not happy with me is it.?then like that time you complain to my mother i never finish.fuck you la feng lu cb mofo knnsai.fuck you.

2007-03-24T17:05:00.000+08:00

fuck you apple.because of you.my ipod has thirty one songs.fuck you.

all hail the heartbreaker

2007-03-23T21:06:00.000+08:00

I had the notion that you'd make me change my ways
My bad habits would be gone in a matter of days
I had the feeling that you'd open up my eyes
To a whole new world that had since been in disguise

But that day will most likely never come for me
And it's just my luck to end up getting stuck
To everything you are

So tonight I'll sit and pick apart your pictures
And overanalyze your words
But the truth is that
I've never fallen so hard
It's taking everything in me
Just to forget your sweater so far

I had the notion that you'd make me forget the world
But your undecisive mind shows me that
You are "just another girl"
I had the feeling that those looks you gave me were real
What if I ripped your heart apart at the seams
Maybe then you'd know how I feel

But that day will most likely never come for me
And it's just my luck to end up getting stuck
To everything you are

So tonight
I'll sit and pick apart your pictures
And overanalyze your words
But the truth is that
I've never fallen so hard
It's taking everything in me
Just to forget your sweater so far

I can honestly say
That I never, ever, ever felt this way
Your lips, your eyelashes, your skin
These are the parts of your body
That cause my comatose to begin

I can honestly say
That I never, ever, ever felt this way
Your lips, your eyelashes, your skin
These are the parts of your body
That cause my comatose to begin

I will sleep another day
I don't really need to anyway
What's the point when my dreams are infected
With words you used to say
I will breathe in a moment
As long as I keep my distance
I wouldn't want to go messing anything up

So don't go worrying about me
It's not like I think about you constantly
So maybe I do, but that shouldn't affect
Your life anymore
I knew it the moment you walked into the door

So don't go worrying about me
It's not like I think about this constantly
So maybe I do, but that shouldn't affect
Your life anymore
I knew it the moment you walked into the door

I'll let you get the best of me
Because there's nothing else that I do well
I'll let you get the best of me
Because there's nothing else that I do well
I'll be the giver and you'll be the taker
I guess that's how this one's gonna go
I'll be the giver and you'll be the taker
You've got me down on my knees and
I proclaim
All hail the heartbreaker

2007-03-22T22:20:00.000+08:00

am i such a distant second to him.?

i'm missing you

2007-03-17T18:22:00.001+08:00

within this house i am trapped.left to my own devices.i wish you were here with me.cause i'm missing you so badly.

snuck

2007-03-16T18:01:00.000+08:00

todayy.snuck out for lunch with couzzie.cabbed to town cause someone gave me short notice.then the taxi driver was so nice.he gave me four bucks off cause he didnt have change and didnt want me to go and change my fifty note.met couzzie at the mrt.make me walk and walk and walk to find her cause she was hiding from her sch ppl hahaha.then went to lido.ate pepper lunch.wheee got treated.!haha.someone took all my rice ): and kept putting icecream on the thing.hahah so evil la.they're gonna have problems removing the icecream yknow.then went to mos next door to get ichigo bliss.! (: gosh i love those three strawberry creams.someone paid for me again ((x then went to the supermarket to find the meiji chocolates but couldnt find.so got the kinder bueno value pack.mmhmmm.then went to borders to get couzzie's stickers and sent her off.then went to cut hair.and home by a one and a half hour mrt.tried to sleep on the train but kept getting calls.tsk.

thats all for today people.

outt.

khoon's playground.

2007-03-14T16:10:00.001+08:00

the night's so goddamn serene it hurts.i feel like just jumping off.ending my life this instant.everything around me's going on oblivious to my pain.i wish you even know how much i miss you.

pink bedsheets

2007-03-13T16:37:00.000+08:00

isnt it just cool.? :) boring day.mug mug mug.tuition later.see you people.

stab my back

2007-03-13T13:46:00.001+08:00

Now we're broken on the floor

She just wants me to share her

It hasn't been this way before

She just wants me to dare her

The phone rings (The phone rings)

And she screams

"Stab my back,It's better when I bleed for you.

Walk on me,It never was enough to do."

I can't get past her

Falling faster

It's true

It hasn't done a lot for you

And every time he held you close

Yeah, were you thinking of me?

When I needed you the most

Well I hope that you're happy

The phone rings (The phone rings)

When she screams

"Stab my back,It's better when I bleed for you.

Walk on me,It never was enough to do."

I can't get past her

Falling faster

It's true

It's better when I bleed for you

I hope that love he gave you

Was just enough to save you

You nearly broke my heart

Just look at what you're tearing apart

Stab my back

It's better when I bleed for you

Walk on me

It never was enough to do

I can't get past her

Falling faster

It's true

It hasn't done a lot for you

It's better when I bleed for you

It never was enough to do

It hasn't done a lot for you

2007-03-13T13:25:00.000+08:00

why cant you reply.give me an answer at least.do you know that the pain hurts so much.its so goddamn pain and i feel like i wanna end my life right here.right now.and just thinking of you makes me wanna cry.so what if i find some other girl.i cant love her the way i love you right.so if you think we'll never ever have another chance let me know.so i can go end my life.

hate me

2007-03-12T15:52:00.000+08:00

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I'm alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you.
Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me?
It is I that wanted space

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

I'm sober now for 3 whole months it's one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I'll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling “Make it go away!”
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered “How can you do this to me?”

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

For you
For you
For you

[Children voices:]
If you're sleeping, are you dreaming,
if you're dreaming are you dreaming of me.
I can't believe you actually picked me

the finale.

2007-03-12T00:34:00.000+08:00

you played with my fucking feelings.and it all lasted within a flicker of the eye.i wish we hadnt started talking at all.so i wouldnt have grown to love you.but now i feel like killing myself cause it hurts so bad.its so close to hate.but its still love.the pain is so goddamn overwhelming.its like i knew.i knew all along it wasnt meant to last no matter how hard i tried.is it me or is it something else.just let me know.and there'll never be anyone who can replace you.i guess its time to say goodbye.it all flashed in front of my eyes within a second and i'm gone.farewell.

2007-03-11T11:55:00.000+08:00

i'll always be waiting for you.

2007-03-09T22:48:00.000+08:00

poof.you made my hopes all disappear in a second.i miss you fucking lots.

2007-03-08T17:56:00.000+08:00

-'s so fine she blows my mind.i want her to be mine and dine with wine on a vine before the clock strikes nine or i'll pine for -.

here in your arms

2007-03-08T07:09:00.000+08:00

where you are the one,the one,that lies close to me.whispers 'hello i miss you quite terribly.' i fell in love,in love,with you suddenly.that there's no place else i could be,but here in your arms.

2007-03-05T16:21:00.000+08:00

if you think i forgot about you.think again.cause it's so hard to let go.

the aftermath

2007-03-04T21:15:00.000+08:00

getting drunk-forgetting all my problems.
sleeping-hoping everyth will be alright in the morn.
you make me wanna give you up.?it aint tt easy girl.cause my love for you encompasses everyth else.

they say

2007-03-03T18:37:00.000+08:00

they say time heals all wounds.my ass.

dontwantto

2007-03-03T17:56:00.000+08:00

no matter what you say.no matter what you do.i won't give you up.i just wanna know what i can do to get your heart back.

the way i do

2007-03-03T13:45:00.000+08:00

Didn't wanna want you.
Didn't wanna need you so bad.

Didn't wanna wake up.

And find that I was falling so fast.

Didn't wanna need you.
Didn't wanna need anyone.

Now look what you've done.

Now I can't go on without you.

I'm naked, I cant fake it.

I'm not that strong without you.

Never thought I could love you the way I do.

the madness

2007-03-02T20:51:00.000+08:00

you took my heart.broke it.and returned it in a million pieces.i just managed to fix it back with whatever i could and you came along.gave me second hope and shattered it all over again.so here i am.trying to mend my broken heart.and if you come along again.please don't break it.i won't know what i'll do then.

i love you more than you can ever know.

how

2007-03-02T18:16:00.000+08:00

my life's a mess and i'm without you.

your call

2007-03-01T21:20:00.000+08:00

cause i was born.to tell you i love you.and i am torn.to do what i have to.to make you mine.stay with me tonight.

and i'm tired.of being all alone.and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home.

poems and love letters.all so wasted.telling you i love you.was that not enough.my heart ain't to be played with.its been two times.both lasted just a moment.i wish it could go on.you gave me new hope.and totally shattered it.you tore my heart open.leaving the wounds exposed and all to see.i wear a bandage.but the pain's just too much for me.i cry my eyes out.my love for you is blind.but i couldn't make you see that i love you more.than you'll ever know.

my life is over.the scars on my wrists never go away.the panadol can't cure the pain in my heart.for you i bleed myself dry.you made it impossible to make life straight.everyone else seems so insignificant to you.cause you captured my heart.

on

2007-03-01T20:50:00.000+08:00

guess where the switch is.(hint-something protruding)

off

2007-03-01T20:47:00.000+08:00

you screwed up my life

2007-02-28T20:41:00.000+08:00

i wish i hadnt met you.then i wouldnt be bleeding inside now.

i wish i hadnt talked to your cousin.then i wouldnt know what was happening.

i wish i didnt love you.so i wouldnt be missing you now.

i wish you could come back to me.but wishes dont always come true.

its hard to let go of you.

the days gone by

2007-02-28T20:07:00.000+08:00

when we were young

broken

2007-02-27T21:42:00.000+08:00

the picture says five words.my heart's shattered into a million pieces.

its all you

2007-02-27T11:34:00.000+08:00

would you look at her she looks at me.she's got me thinking about her constantly.but she dont know how i feel.and she carries on without a doubt.i wonder if she'll think it out.i'm crazy for this girl.i'm crazy for this girl.

even esprit

2007-02-26T20:08:00.000+08:00

buddyyy

2007-02-26T14:22:00.000+08:00

since sec one :)

thank you

2007-02-26T13:32:00.000+08:00

for not smoking

number two

2007-02-25T10:53:00.000+08:00

happy birthday

2007-02-25T01:19:00.000+08:00

to me.and charlene :)

read this

2007-02-24T11:28:00.000+08:00

tsk

2007-02-24T10:39:00.000+08:00

haha roy szuker and kenneth watching nice nice. :)